Changes

Hi Everyone! Fall is coming up fast! Football is here and I'll soon be making chili and pumpkin bars and bread weekly! With fall, we officially have a Kindergartener. Olivia has adjusted well to the new Big K scene, as we like to call it, I'm still adjusting. She loves it there and has made a cute little friend or two. She is also involved in a kid's fitness class where they walk each morning in the gym. The older kids record their laps but the K's just walk. She's learning to do lots of things on her own, from putting on shoes to buttoning hard buttons. She's doing great. She's even ridden the bus! The big bus! Ugh. I was informed by the neighbor boys that the back of the bus is reserved for the 5th graders. Oooh. Apparently, Olivia is the last stop on the bus route so there weren't any seats and the 5th graders had to move over per bus driver request and let her sit down with them. Drama! I bet Olivia was in heaven.

Each Kindergarten day is gauged on a stop light poster of behavior in their room. Each kid has a clip and if they have to move their clip from blue (the outside of the poster) to green, they need to adjust their behavior. Yellow is worse and red is big time trouble. At the end of the day, if their clip was not moved, they get a hand stamp saying they had an untouchable awesome day. Olivia has returned home without a stamp twice so far. Once for yelling in the hallway and once for "shoving the line". We had a long talk about thinking about our actions before we act on them. Saying to ourselves, "Will this hurt someone? Will this make someone upset?" If the answer is yes or maybe, we shouldn't do it. Unless it's CPR of course. A couple of broken ribs and some upset people is worth saving a life. But let's not get too technical.

Speaking of getting technical, I've been taking A LOT of online assessments (a nice word for exams), to prepare for boards. I'm so frustrated today. I used to do really well and now I seem to be in a rut. They seem to pick some obscure drug that no one has heard of and ask about a obscure side effect or interaction with another drug I've never heard of. It's so frustrating. Just when I start getting comfy. Plus, I've initiated a general rule in my practice to look up every drug that I don't know and know it before I hand it over to the patient. So, can't there be an option E? Look it up in the drug book? That's my answer.

My goal is to not stress too much about boards, to trust that God will give me the tools I need to succeed. After all, it does say so in the Bible somewhere. Anyone remember it? So, that is my quest. I'll let you know how it all turns out.

I started my job last week on W3CC. Steve loves that I'm finally making money. He even made me dinner one night after a long shift. What could be better? It is nice to be able to contribute too. My first week was a nice little wake up call for me to get into the game and take over some nursing responsibility. The nurses around me do a good job of giving me a little shove into what might be over my head or a little scary for me. It was "sink or swim" when I found myself admitting my first patient and no one showed up to help me or tell me what to do. I swam I think... a few gulps of water but nothing too terrible. I went back out to the nurse's station flustered and red faced and sweating and everyone was sitting there smiling expectingly, "Well...how did it go?" Jerks. Times like these, we see what we are made of, even if we don't care to see it. It wasn't SO bad. I did lots of things I haven't done before, things that they wouldn't let us do as students. Pull arterial lines, hold pressure, hang blood, call report to people. And I've learned that comfortable is not the place of learning. I need to be very uncomfortable in order for me to learn my most valued lessons. I guess that I should see this current rut in my test taking as perfect timing. I guess I need to learn some more before boards, and they're coming up VERY soon, although the exact date will not be disclosed. I don't know if I could civilly handle repeating "how it went" more than once without sobbing. I've heard sobbing is standard. Two days of it actually.

Back to family...I've been enjoying this new schedule of Kindergarten and work, no nursing school! I get two whole weekdays off with just Sophie. We have a good time. She calls them our "special days" when its just us. Turns out its pretty easy hanging out with just one. We miss our little Livy Lu though and look forward to 3:15 pm. :)

Well, there's a little update on us, mostly me, sorry. I'll get over myself as soon as I can.

Here's some pics of the girls and their little friend Chloe who spent the night with us the other night. They were helping Steve put together a shelf for our bathroom decked out in full princess attire, holding screwdrivers. I thought it was funny. There's also pics from graduation and Liv's first day of Kindergarten. Take care and let me know how YOU are doing!

Love,

Mel

The end is near

It is officially 2 days until graduation and I have to say, it's surreal. My fellow nursing student friends and I have been counting down the days for two and a half years by various methods....a virtual countdown box on their myspace page, a paper chain they made with their kids, a mental note of time remaining down to the minutes and seconds, and now it's here. My new feelings are unexpected. I expected to feel fully prepared and ready to get out there and be on my own. But, now I know that the real learning comes through pain, that is, making mistakes on the floor. I'm told the real learning occurs when you are in that situation the first time. What do you do? How do you react? What could have been done better? The responsibility of what lies ahead is weighing on my mind. At the same time, the excitement of this achievement overwhelms me. Could it really actually happen this time? The G word? After countless transfers between schools and two babies, and a few hospitalizations...could it really come true? It might be sappy, but it's true. I'm grateful for this day that's coming. There were times that I didn't think it would come. There were times that I considered giving in. Maybe it was a character flaw or maybe I had too high of expectations for myself and I thought I could do something that was really out of reach. When I looked at my girls though, I realized that I wanted to teach them a lesson in their lives. That hard work produces achievement, even in the face of adversity and set backs. I wanted to show them that education means something, and even though they won't know it for a long time, I did this for them and for me. This means a better life for them, for us.

I'm in awe of the responsibility that awaits. I'm amazed that I have the priviledge to be present during someone's time of need. I'm proud of this upcoming day. I'm excited for my party even though its supposed to rain and be cold. I'll be there eating pasta salad and enjoying the moment. I hope you'll join me.

Finally, thank you everyone for your support, kind words, and encouragement throughout. I have friends and family to rival all. There are those who babysat my girls when I had a big paper due, those who called to sing me ridiculous songs of encouragement on my voicemail, those who called to ask how it was going, those who loved to listen to the nursing stories, those who let me vent and freak out over an unknown test result. Most of all, thank you to those who knew I could do it, and believed it no matter what. What a gift you have given me. Ok...now pray for BOARDS!

:)

Mel

Sophie's response

Today Sophie was drawing on a pad of paper in the car. I glanced back and told her I thought her picture was pretty. I asked what she was drawing. She said, "I'm working on my prototype Mom."


Really.