3 bedroom ONE bath

Sometimes, the smaller size of our house is overwhelming. Sometimes, it's just plain entertaining. Point and case?

We have one bathroom. Count them. ONE.

This morning. Early. Mom has a terrible sinus infection. Eli has just eaten and has fallen back to sleep. (Score)! Mom tries to lay down but can't breathe. Mom is trying not to cough and wake up sleeping baby. Mom dreams of a hot bath, with coffee cup on side of the tub, bubbles, and hot washcloth over eyes. Dark, quiet...perhaps a candle. Maybe I could breathe again.......I wake Steve. I whisper...can you watch the baby while I take a bath? I'm too sick to sleep. He's right here next to you."

Steve: "Just wait 5 minutes. I just want to take a quick shower. Stay here for 5 minutes and then you can take a bath."

Me: Sigh. Fine.

5 minutes later I sneak downstairs. I grab my coffee cup. I enter the ONLY bathroom in our house. I slip into the shower when Steve's eyes are closed while washing his face. He opens his eyes to me grinning. He has screamed like a little girl. He gets out slightly annoyed. He asks why I left the door open.

I didn't. We look around the corner.

Good morning Sophie.

Sophie is on the toilet. Grrreat. I close the shower curtain. I put the drain plug in and lay down. I put the washcloth over my eyes.

"Mom!"

Good morning Olivia.

"MOM! MOM! MOOOMMMM! Why do you have a washcloth on your eyes?"

"BECAUSE". I yell without opening my eyes. 

Olivia fights with Sophie over the toilet. Steve explains that there is only ONE toilet and she'll have to wait. Olivia bangs on the door after Steve shoos her out. This wakes the baby.

Sigh....

The bathroom now smells. Steve is shaving. Olivia re-enters, screams something about life being unfair and Sophie tattle-tailing. Whatever. She is now on the toilet.

Steve has shut off my bath water. It's still about 5 inches short of where I like it. I argue. He states we are saving water. I put my head under the water and try to breathe it in. It doesn't work.

I reach over to my coffee cup. This'll be good, I think. I attempt to take a sip without sitting up. I spill half of it on my chest. Luckily, it's cold since I have ignored it thus far. I wonder if there is coffee scented bubble bath. I wonder if I should invent it.

I sit up, peeved.

"Steve! All I dreamed of was a relaxing hot bath! I just wanted a washcloth over my eyes and a dark quiet room....ALONE."

Steve: "Well, I'm here. Pretty much a dream come true."

Right.

I've changed my dream. 4 bedroom 5 bath. 4 out of 5 bathrooms are mine.