Monday, March 29, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
To whom I love
Sophie is a little person with a BIG imagination. She can spend hours upon hours setting up elaborate scenes with her stuffed animals. They have names, personalities, crises, fights, make-ups, babies, weddings....everything necessary for real life. She fishes in puddles in our driveway and makes special magic potion in my fire bowl on the deck. She is a puppy most of the time and calls all meat "muskrat" and dinner is "slop". Thanks. She collects bouncy balls and spent half the afternoon cleaning Rosie's bouncy balls off with the outside spicket. She picked out ET yesterday at the library and asked questions every 2-3 seconds, until we all screamed, "JUST WATCH AND YOU"LL FIND OUT!!!!!!!"........"OKKKK!!!!!!" she screamed back. She loves doing "homework" with Dad, and is starting to read on her own now. She copies words out of books onto her own paper. I find sheets covered in various words she chose out of her books. No order, no reason. She just likes them. She loves her sister. They laugh and giggle and cause lots and lots of trouble together. She requires there to be a dog in every movie she watches or she just won't participate. She is a peacemaker at preschool, working hard to resolve fights between friends. Her giggle and toothless smile are to die for. And I love her.
I have a baby in my belly that may be a he or a she. We find out today. The girls are dressed in their casual finest. I pick them up at noon, even though Olivia told me she normally eats lunch around 6:45 and I should pick her up after that because she prefers to eat first....and then we'll pick up Steve, and we'll go check out our soon to be brother or sister, son or daughter the III. I'll tell you what I know about this baby. This baby caused me trouble from the start. And if they say sickness is an indicator of hormone levels, and if hormone levels mean you have a strong baby in there, then this must be the strongest, most beautiful genius baby ever born. Right? Baby kicks at night, all night...I'm sure because some nights, I'm awake all night too. Baby thinks this is normal. There's just no real adjusting to a schedule like this, that baby and I keep. Baby says no to me eating red sauce of any kind and no to oatmeal and cream of wheat. I oblige to all except for a tiny bit of pizza sauce, because pizza is indispensable. This is a really fun pregnancy for me, I think, maybe because it is welcomed into a family well established, which means, I know how lucky he/she is....to have two sisters that are so excited to dress him/her up (as gender won't matter in this case), and teach him/her things that I'm sure I'd rather not be taught. But I also know those big sisters have baby's best interest in mind and they feel committed to helping out, taking care of the baby. But most of all, I'm excited because we have 4 people waiting in this house that already love this little one more than this baby can know. And I love this baby.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Cheep
Cheep. Cheep. Cheep. Cheep. Cheep............cheep......CHEEP.......chEEP.......cheep.....CHEEP!!!
There is a bird outside my window that is relentless this morning. Sometimes working nights can be a blessing. Sometimes I wake up at odd hours after working a few nights in a row, unable to sleep, but wanting to. But those times are actually good times, because if I were sleeping at those times, I might be really annoyed at being woken up by a unrelenting bird.
But the bird reminded me of something this morning. SUMMER. I love waking up on summer mornings (if I actually sleep the night before) because long before the sun is actually up, the birds totally know about it. They start singing long before they should (because we've decided they should start right about sunrise). By the time you go outside, even in the early stages of daylight, the world is inundated with the SOUND of nature. It sounds like a party we missed out on. And it is....
I have found that I connect to God in many different ways. My most obvious way is through music. Not just music on the Christian channel with hokey pokey announcers, although I do listen to them too at times, but all music. A song can lift my spirit up to the highest of highs while driving down the highway on my way to Target or a song chock full of heart and soul can carry me deep to that place too. But both of those roads lead me to God.
The Earth. That brings me to God too. The annoying bird outside my window made me dream of a summer morning, cool but not freezing, dew on the ground, my fruit trees blooming, flowers opening in the sun, the light slowly revealing the promise of a new day, the sound of the birds knowing something we don't.....I just love summer mornings. I think about the ones that I've lived before, what I've done with those days. I took my kids to the lake. We hung clothes out in the breeze. I lay in the sun in my overpriced recliner beach chair that was a gift to myself one Mother's Day. The girls squeal as they run through the sprinkler. It brings me a sense described by a very straaange word that doesn't seem to fit the bill...NOSTALGIA.
Gehundseit.
That was Olivia's response to me (and the word nostalgia) last night, as we drove home from church in the evening, just her and me in a big bellowing diesel truck (my car needs new tires). She said,
"Mom?"
"HUH?!" I hollered back to her in the back seat. The diesel is unbelievably loud on the interstate.
"Mom? I have a funny feeling."
"Ok, sweetie. What is it?"
"Well, I'm not sure. It's like I'm thinking of when Sophie is not here. And I cling to you sometimes. Sometimes you take me to the beach and I love that. I like remembering those things."
Me: still not getting it. "You like when you have times with just Mom? Not Sophie?"
"No, I just have a feeling when I remember those things. It's a good one."
"Oh, ok!" I said, now getting it and LOVING the way she described it. "I totally know what you mean," I said. It has a really funny word that we can call that feeling. Want to know it?" She nodded excitedly....
"NOSTALGIA".
She scrunched up her nose. "Nostoooga?"
Me: "NO STALL JUH".
Liv: "NO STALL JUH".
Exactly. We laughed. And I loved that she felt that feeling too...evidence of a good life that she can remember well, and enjoy looking back on. Good times, bad times, whatever.
The promise of the next day. The thing the birds know that we sometimes forget. Kids get it too. And I just LOVE my kids.
I thank God for entrusting them to me, even when I seemed the most unlikely recipient of something so precious. And while I'm still imperfect in many many ways, I'm just so thankful he chose me.
The heavens declare you are God, and the mountains rejoice. The oceans cry hallelujah as we worship you Lord. For this is our song of love.
There is a bird outside my window that is relentless this morning. Sometimes working nights can be a blessing. Sometimes I wake up at odd hours after working a few nights in a row, unable to sleep, but wanting to. But those times are actually good times, because if I were sleeping at those times, I might be really annoyed at being woken up by a unrelenting bird.
But the bird reminded me of something this morning. SUMMER. I love waking up on summer mornings (if I actually sleep the night before) because long before the sun is actually up, the birds totally know about it. They start singing long before they should (because we've decided they should start right about sunrise). By the time you go outside, even in the early stages of daylight, the world is inundated with the SOUND of nature. It sounds like a party we missed out on. And it is....
I have found that I connect to God in many different ways. My most obvious way is through music. Not just music on the Christian channel with hokey pokey announcers, although I do listen to them too at times, but all music. A song can lift my spirit up to the highest of highs while driving down the highway on my way to Target or a song chock full of heart and soul can carry me deep to that place too. But both of those roads lead me to God.
The Earth. That brings me to God too. The annoying bird outside my window made me dream of a summer morning, cool but not freezing, dew on the ground, my fruit trees blooming, flowers opening in the sun, the light slowly revealing the promise of a new day, the sound of the birds knowing something we don't.....I just love summer mornings. I think about the ones that I've lived before, what I've done with those days. I took my kids to the lake. We hung clothes out in the breeze. I lay in the sun in my overpriced recliner beach chair that was a gift to myself one Mother's Day. The girls squeal as they run through the sprinkler. It brings me a sense described by a very straaange word that doesn't seem to fit the bill...NOSTALGIA.
Gehundseit.
That was Olivia's response to me (and the word nostalgia) last night, as we drove home from church in the evening, just her and me in a big bellowing diesel truck (my car needs new tires). She said,
"Mom?"
"HUH?!" I hollered back to her in the back seat. The diesel is unbelievably loud on the interstate.
"Mom? I have a funny feeling."
"Ok, sweetie. What is it?"
"Well, I'm not sure. It's like I'm thinking of when Sophie is not here. And I cling to you sometimes. Sometimes you take me to the beach and I love that. I like remembering those things."
Me: still not getting it. "You like when you have times with just Mom? Not Sophie?"
"No, I just have a feeling when I remember those things. It's a good one."
"Oh, ok!" I said, now getting it and LOVING the way she described it. "I totally know what you mean," I said. It has a really funny word that we can call that feeling. Want to know it?" She nodded excitedly....
"NOSTALGIA".
She scrunched up her nose. "Nostoooga?"
Me: "NO STALL JUH".
Liv: "NO STALL JUH".
Exactly. We laughed. And I loved that she felt that feeling too...evidence of a good life that she can remember well, and enjoy looking back on. Good times, bad times, whatever.
The promise of the next day. The thing the birds know that we sometimes forget. Kids get it too. And I just LOVE my kids.
I thank God for entrusting them to me, even when I seemed the most unlikely recipient of something so precious. And while I'm still imperfect in many many ways, I'm just so thankful he chose me.
The heavens declare you are God, and the mountains rejoice. The oceans cry hallelujah as we worship you Lord. For this is our song of love.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Image free
I lost my camera cord. Not the USB easily replaced one. The one that I plug in to charge my battery. So, while I've been patiently waiting for it to find me, I've also been putting off a new blog post until I can decorate it properly with visual candy. However, it appears that my camera cord is not reappearing.
I guess I don't have much of a topic today. I just felt the need to write and I thought I could update you on new events around here. Perhaps you are bored beyond all belief at work and actually have time to care about what's new with me. In that case, this ones for you.
1. It's nice out. Surprise! We love this weather. We'll take 50's, even 60's this time of year. And I won't complain. In fact, we celebrate it. I hung clothes out on the line today (my all-time fav activity), the girls played and played and played outside. The neighbor boys recently decided it was ok to play with the girls since it's the girls or no one on our block....and they actually play really well together. Right now, they are playing ninjas and carrying around big sticks. I'm turning a blind eye to the whole thing in the name of fun...and they'll probably come home with a blind eye from running with sticks....but we'll leave this one up to chance. I mean, how many stuuuupid things did I do when I was little? And I lived...My friend and I used to drink straight from a little "stream" of "water" coming from a maintenance yard because the water was "clear" and didn't taste that bad. Hmmm...
2. I love coffee again. This is so awesome you guys. After a looong few months of lying on my death bed, I finally enjoy food and beverage again. Especially my favorite bev, coffee. I'm so glad it's back. In fact, I'm drinking it right now...and it's great. Amen.
3. I'm almost done with this blasted girl scout cookie nightmare. Why did I encourage Olivia to sell sell sell? Now we just have to deliver deliver deliver and collect collect collect. I think next year, I'll encourage her to meet a new, better goal of 20 boxes...instead of 200. I think she can do it.
4. I'm pregnant. For real. Wait, that's not news. You know what is though? I LOOK pregnant. In fact, people on the street may notice now. I'm in full blown maternity pants. It's nice to actually look pregnant, because now I no longer have to explain why I look/feel the way I do. It's clear. I think....unless....this is one of those times that my reverse anorexia is acting up. Instead of thinking that I'm fat when I'm actually skinny, I think I'm skinny when I'm actually fat. It's always a rude awakening when some evil person decides to "capture the moment" and take a picture of me. It's only then that I realize the truth about how I actually look. The shock is only temporary though...I'm quickly back to thinking I look amazing. Yep, I do.
With this actually looking pregnant thing, I've actually begun to feel pregnant. My hips hurt. They're probably wondering why there's so much extra weight sitting on top of them. Sometimes, after a hard days rockin, I can barely creak my joints across the room. I blame my "petite frame" for not being strong enough to bear this extra weight. (See above description of my disease to catch the sarcasm).
5. I feel happy. It's amazing what Spring does to me. I've raked and swept my yard (thanks for the idea Dan). I've put in little white anti-bunny fences around my growing plants outside. Thanks for the help Mom! I've scooped more dog poop than ever imaginable from my back yard. (Thanks no one but me). I've hung clothes on the line. I've gone on walks and actually enjoyed them. I've gone through my clothes and started spring cleaning. I've grilled out several times in the past 3 days. It's like waking up from hibernation around here. And it's beautiful.....
6. Wednesday, we find out if we have a little baby she or a little baby he. Stay tuned.....
I guess I don't have much of a topic today. I just felt the need to write and I thought I could update you on new events around here. Perhaps you are bored beyond all belief at work and actually have time to care about what's new with me. In that case, this ones for you.
1. It's nice out. Surprise! We love this weather. We'll take 50's, even 60's this time of year. And I won't complain. In fact, we celebrate it. I hung clothes out on the line today (my all-time fav activity), the girls played and played and played outside. The neighbor boys recently decided it was ok to play with the girls since it's the girls or no one on our block....and they actually play really well together. Right now, they are playing ninjas and carrying around big sticks. I'm turning a blind eye to the whole thing in the name of fun...and they'll probably come home with a blind eye from running with sticks....but we'll leave this one up to chance. I mean, how many stuuuupid things did I do when I was little? And I lived...My friend and I used to drink straight from a little "stream" of "water" coming from a maintenance yard because the water was "clear" and didn't taste that bad. Hmmm...
2. I love coffee again. This is so awesome you guys. After a looong few months of lying on my death bed, I finally enjoy food and beverage again. Especially my favorite bev, coffee. I'm so glad it's back. In fact, I'm drinking it right now...and it's great. Amen.
3. I'm almost done with this blasted girl scout cookie nightmare. Why did I encourage Olivia to sell sell sell? Now we just have to deliver deliver deliver and collect collect collect. I think next year, I'll encourage her to meet a new, better goal of 20 boxes...instead of 200. I think she can do it.
4. I'm pregnant. For real. Wait, that's not news. You know what is though? I LOOK pregnant. In fact, people on the street may notice now. I'm in full blown maternity pants. It's nice to actually look pregnant, because now I no longer have to explain why I look/feel the way I do. It's clear. I think....unless....this is one of those times that my reverse anorexia is acting up. Instead of thinking that I'm fat when I'm actually skinny, I think I'm skinny when I'm actually fat. It's always a rude awakening when some evil person decides to "capture the moment" and take a picture of me. It's only then that I realize the truth about how I actually look. The shock is only temporary though...I'm quickly back to thinking I look amazing. Yep, I do.
With this actually looking pregnant thing, I've actually begun to feel pregnant. My hips hurt. They're probably wondering why there's so much extra weight sitting on top of them. Sometimes, after a hard days rockin, I can barely creak my joints across the room. I blame my "petite frame" for not being strong enough to bear this extra weight. (See above description of my disease to catch the sarcasm).
5. I feel happy. It's amazing what Spring does to me. I've raked and swept my yard (thanks for the idea Dan). I've put in little white anti-bunny fences around my growing plants outside. Thanks for the help Mom! I've scooped more dog poop than ever imaginable from my back yard. (Thanks no one but me). I've hung clothes on the line. I've gone on walks and actually enjoyed them. I've gone through my clothes and started spring cleaning. I've grilled out several times in the past 3 days. It's like waking up from hibernation around here. And it's beautiful.....
6. Wednesday, we find out if we have a little baby she or a little baby he. Stay tuned.....
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
TAG
Thanks for the TAG Abby!
RULES:
1. Open your first photo folder on your computer.
2. Scroll to the 10th picture.
3. Post that picture and the story behind it.
4. Tag 5 or more people.
Here is my 10th picture! This is little miss Olivia and I, one COLD saturday after I had worked all night the night before, at a soccer game in Pleasant Hill. Brrrr...but I wouldn't have missed it for the world.
I TAG: Amy P., Lianna, Mom, Tara, & Dan
Have a great day everybody!
RULES:
1. Open your first photo folder on your computer.
2. Scroll to the 10th picture.
3. Post that picture and the story behind it.
4. Tag 5 or more people.
I TAG: Amy P., Lianna, Mom, Tara, & Dan
Have a great day everybody!
Monday, March 15, 2010
Read this
http://itsalmostnaptime.blogspot.com/2010/02/i-dont-want-my-children-to-be-happy.html
I saw this on another friend's blog and it blew me away. Hope you enjoy it's profoundness as well. Please comment!
I saw this on another friend's blog and it blew me away. Hope you enjoy it's profoundness as well. Please comment!
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
All this for a fish
We visited Petsmart the other night. You may think it's easy to buy a replacement fish for Slimey, the one who recently met his maker....but turns out....it's not.
Me: Excuse me, do you think you could help us get an angelfish?
Lady: Looking suspicious...."Are you a professional fish grower?"
Me: "What? Um...no. We just want an angelfish to replace our other fish that just died." I gestured towards the big blue eyed sad kids by my side.
Lady: "Well, how big is your tank?"
Me: "Oh, about the same size as the one the angelfish are in."
Lady: "Do you have a filter?"
Me: "Yes".
Lady: "Angelfish are semi-aggressive and they are also school fish. You'll need at least three. And your tank is not big enough. They'll get a few inches bigger."
Me: getting peeved at this point...."Um...could you please just get us out an angelfish? It's what the kids' hearts are set on...so if you could just help us out, I promise you, we'll provide the fish with a good home."
Lady: "FINE."
Me: trying to lighten the mood..."it won't live that long anyway".
Lady: AGHAST. Expression of disgust and a large sigh.
Hmmmm...perhaps I said the wrong thing?
Well, whatever...we are now in possession of not one, but two angelfish to complete the trio of awesomeness down in the plenty large pink aquarium. Swimmy, Sharky, and Pretty: the happiest fish in the world.
Me: Excuse me, do you think you could help us get an angelfish?
Lady: Looking suspicious...."Are you a professional fish grower?"
Me: "What? Um...no. We just want an angelfish to replace our other fish that just died." I gestured towards the big blue eyed sad kids by my side.
Lady: "Well, how big is your tank?"
Me: "Oh, about the same size as the one the angelfish are in."
Lady: "Do you have a filter?"
Me: "Yes".
Lady: "Angelfish are semi-aggressive and they are also school fish. You'll need at least three. And your tank is not big enough. They'll get a few inches bigger."
Me: getting peeved at this point...."Um...could you please just get us out an angelfish? It's what the kids' hearts are set on...so if you could just help us out, I promise you, we'll provide the fish with a good home."
Lady: "FINE."
Me: trying to lighten the mood..."it won't live that long anyway".
Lady: AGHAST. Expression of disgust and a large sigh.
Hmmmm...perhaps I said the wrong thing?
Well, whatever...we are now in possession of not one, but two angelfish to complete the trio of awesomeness down in the plenty large pink aquarium. Swimmy, Sharky, and Pretty: the happiest fish in the world.
Monday, March 8, 2010
This phenomenon
This is off the subject of what I planned on writing about, but.....
I just watched my neighbor from across the street, get in her SUV, drive out of her driveway to the mailbox and drive back into her driveway. Will someone please shoot me when I get THAT lazy?
Anyway, on to less judgmental topics.
To beat the subject to near death...and I'm sure this won't be the last post of this nature....but who's excited about the weather?!!!
I'm not the only one who freaks out over 40 degree weather. Facebook is abuzz over this phenomenon.....with status updates such as: "I opened my windows for 40 degree weather!" "I'm actually cleaning because of this weather!" "We went outside today and it was amazing!" "RAIN?!" "Let's lay out!"
Iowans are funny. Because who can truly appreciate the hints of Spring like an Iowan can? An Iowan who has endured snow, sleet, ice, fender benders, ditches, and rollovers, school closings, snowblowing, shoveling, and FREEZING temperatures for months on endless month? Way to go Iowans! We survived! You keep enjoying this phenomenon called "Spring". Because if we don't appreciate 40 degree weather...who will?
I just watched my neighbor from across the street, get in her SUV, drive out of her driveway to the mailbox and drive back into her driveway. Will someone please shoot me when I get THAT lazy?
Anyway, on to less judgmental topics.
To beat the subject to near death...and I'm sure this won't be the last post of this nature....but who's excited about the weather?!!!
I'm not the only one who freaks out over 40 degree weather. Facebook is abuzz over this phenomenon.....with status updates such as: "I opened my windows for 40 degree weather!" "I'm actually cleaning because of this weather!" "We went outside today and it was amazing!" "RAIN?!" "Let's lay out!"
Iowans are funny. Because who can truly appreciate the hints of Spring like an Iowan can? An Iowan who has endured snow, sleet, ice, fender benders, ditches, and rollovers, school closings, snowblowing, shoveling, and FREEZING temperatures for months on endless month? Way to go Iowans! We survived! You keep enjoying this phenomenon called "Spring". Because if we don't appreciate 40 degree weather...who will?
Friday, March 5, 2010
Because I said so
Here are some pictures from some of the LAST few days of winter. Because I've said so, winter is officially over. And if it snows again, it will be one of those freak spring snow storms no one expected, because it certainly won't stick....
We've had 40 degree days lately which = HOT here in Iowa right now. So we ventured outside for some "spring" activities. Like....
Ice fishing in the driveway. This has to be my very favorite thing that Sophie chooses to do. We put an orange on the hook for safety purposes (and to attract the big ones), and away she fished. She was ecstatic we had actual puddles instead of an arctic frozen wasteland. It was adorable.
Snowmobiling! Wait....is that a spring activity? Yes. Because I said so. Happy Spring!
Is that not *THE* cutest snowmobiler baby you've ever seen?! Yes, I called her a baby.....and she still is...because I said so. ;)
We've had 40 degree days lately which = HOT here in Iowa right now. So we ventured outside for some "spring" activities. Like....
Ice fishing in the driveway. This has to be my very favorite thing that Sophie chooses to do. We put an orange on the hook for safety purposes (and to attract the big ones), and away she fished. She was ecstatic we had actual puddles instead of an arctic frozen wasteland. It was adorable.
Snowmobiling! Wait....is that a spring activity? Yes. Because I said so. Happy Spring!
Is that not *THE* cutest snowmobiler baby you've ever seen?! Yes, I called her a baby.....and she still is...because I said so. ;)
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Sermon notes
When I was in junior high, we were required to take sermon notes during church. Most of these consisted of my friend Sara and I writing notes back and forth about school gossip and boys we were going to marry. Other times, I insisted on my Dad drawing me pictures of the rat fink....wish I could reproduce that picture for you here! I looked it up on Google and realized my Dad drew much happier versions of the real Rat Fink. Ours always had a big smile and long cute tail, big ears, big eyes. Rat Fink was adorable. But the REAL rat fink....not adorable! Thanks Dad, for making it more cartoon for us! I love my Dad.
Last week, I found myself at church, alone, for the first time in a long time. And while I love going to church with my family, there's something to a bit of solitude as well. I could listen without picking up bags of spilled cheerios, without splitting up fights over the one blue crayon, without digging gum out of my purse to fill up loud mouths, without two trips to the bathroom and one for water.
So what did I do with my solitariness? I took sermon notes. And it turns out, I got a lot more out of church than I normally do.
First of all, I learned that FASTING (one of the spiritual disciplines) means giving up something...not necessarily food. This is where the "giving something up for lent" comes from. Not sure why it took me so long to make this connection, but I have to say, I breathed a sigh of relief. I have a very love/love relationship with food right now. Please don't take that away from me.
Anywaay, this sermon was about STUDY, another spiritual discipline. Read the Bible...blah blah blah. That's what I was thinking. I've tried this before. And many times, I find an excellent passage that really applies to what I'm searching for. But others....most of the time...I find this:
A record of the genealogy of Jesus Christ the son of David, the son of Abraham:
2Abraham was the father of Isaac,
Isaac the father of Jacob,
Jacob the father of Judah and his brothers,
3Judah the father of Perez and Zerah, whose mother was Tamar,
Perez the father of Hezron,
Hezron the father of Ram,
4Ram the father of Amminadab,
Ok.....Amminadab....I'm putting that one on my baby name list. The above example was also read by Pastor Mike as an example of what people run into when they try to start reading the Bible. And honestly, it's frustrating. Agreed. I have, for a long time, been frustrated by my lack of knowledge of the Bible, comforted by others' quick library of awesome scripture to help me in my times of need, and I wonder...could I be one of those with a library like that on hand someday?
Eh....maybe.
But the points that I loved from this sermon were that:
Studying God's word brings JOY.
In order to be strong, solid people, we need to build our foundations on solid ground (God's word). This brought me to one of my fav hymns...
On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand.
And that was the sermon note that hit me most. I personally, love to build myself up on what I know, what I need, what I want, what I think. And it's so devastating when you fall from that pedestal. Which I do.....a lot. But every time I drive to work, I listen to the Women of Faith CD from last year, where they do a mix of "In Christ Alone" and "On Christ the Solid Rock"...amazing. And it always strikes me deep. For when I feel like I just can't do another night (every time I drive to work), I'm reminded that I don't necessarily have to stand on my own, and when I rely on my own strength, I do indeed, fall. It's upsetting to me that I can't just power through sometimes. Just be stronger! Just try harder!!!! Stop being weak! Other people can do it, why can't you!? I can be, and am, my own worst enemy.
I think that's why it's so important for me to be reminded that in order to make it, I need to build upon something stronger than my own strength, because my strength will always, eventually, fail. God's won't.
So while I jump in again, I'm hoping to strengthen my foundation through the study of God's word. For the pursuit of stability, knowledge, and strength....(I know there's better stuff than genealogy in there...) :) and we'll just see what I can find.
Here are a few tips we were given to make the Bible reading thing work:
Start with prayer
Give it time
Reflect on what you've read...write about it
Read it again
Look for study guides/resources about the passage
Humble yourself
Listen
James 4:10
Last week, I found myself at church, alone, for the first time in a long time. And while I love going to church with my family, there's something to a bit of solitude as well. I could listen without picking up bags of spilled cheerios, without splitting up fights over the one blue crayon, without digging gum out of my purse to fill up loud mouths, without two trips to the bathroom and one for water.
So what did I do with my solitariness? I took sermon notes. And it turns out, I got a lot more out of church than I normally do.
First of all, I learned that FASTING (one of the spiritual disciplines) means giving up something...not necessarily food. This is where the "giving something up for lent" comes from. Not sure why it took me so long to make this connection, but I have to say, I breathed a sigh of relief. I have a very love/love relationship with food right now. Please don't take that away from me.
Anywaay, this sermon was about STUDY, another spiritual discipline. Read the Bible...blah blah blah. That's what I was thinking. I've tried this before. And many times, I find an excellent passage that really applies to what I'm searching for. But others....most of the time...I find this:
A record of the genealogy of Jesus Christ the son of David, the son of Abraham:
2Abraham was the father of Isaac,
Isaac the father of Jacob,
Jacob the father of Judah and his brothers,
3Judah the father of Perez and Zerah, whose mother was Tamar,
Perez the father of Hezron,
Hezron the father of Ram,
4Ram the father of Amminadab,
Ok.....Amminadab....I'm putting that one on my baby name list. The above example was also read by Pastor Mike as an example of what people run into when they try to start reading the Bible. And honestly, it's frustrating. Agreed. I have, for a long time, been frustrated by my lack of knowledge of the Bible, comforted by others' quick library of awesome scripture to help me in my times of need, and I wonder...could I be one of those with a library like that on hand someday?
Eh....maybe.
But the points that I loved from this sermon were that:
Studying God's word brings JOY.
In order to be strong, solid people, we need to build our foundations on solid ground (God's word). This brought me to one of my fav hymns...
On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand.
And that was the sermon note that hit me most. I personally, love to build myself up on what I know, what I need, what I want, what I think. And it's so devastating when you fall from that pedestal. Which I do.....a lot. But every time I drive to work, I listen to the Women of Faith CD from last year, where they do a mix of "In Christ Alone" and "On Christ the Solid Rock"...amazing. And it always strikes me deep. For when I feel like I just can't do another night (every time I drive to work), I'm reminded that I don't necessarily have to stand on my own, and when I rely on my own strength, I do indeed, fall. It's upsetting to me that I can't just power through sometimes. Just be stronger! Just try harder!!!! Stop being weak! Other people can do it, why can't you!? I can be, and am, my own worst enemy.
I think that's why it's so important for me to be reminded that in order to make it, I need to build upon something stronger than my own strength, because my strength will always, eventually, fail. God's won't.
So while I jump in again, I'm hoping to strengthen my foundation through the study of God's word. For the pursuit of stability, knowledge, and strength....(I know there's better stuff than genealogy in there...) :) and we'll just see what I can find.
Here are a few tips we were given to make the Bible reading thing work:
Start with prayer
Give it time
Reflect on what you've read...write about it
Read it again
Look for study guides/resources about the passage
Humble yourself
Listen
James 4:10
10Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.
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