40 days of osem

My new background signifies my decision that it is now Spring. Aren't you excited? I am. I know changing my blog background will help it along its way. For sure. Darrell said he heard a robin this morning while scooping snow. I believe it. And I'm grasping onto that idea.....tightly. :)

This morning I went to volunteer for Meals from the Heartland. This particular event was to package meals for Haiti and victims of the earthquake. I heard of the event at church last night at 5 pm. By the time I signed up it was 7 am this morning. Packaging meals only lasted til 8:30. I frowned.

I've wanted to volunteer for Meals from the Heartland for about 4 years now. Each year, I have great intentions. One year, I was sick. The rest I was just busy. Busy. I'm learning to hate that word.

At church last night, our pastor talked about "busy". How we put off the things we think we should do, or the things we even want to do because we're busy. We're busy with work, and school, kids, activities, hobbies. Whatever it is keeping us busy, it's real. We are, as Americans, very busy.

I find that I'm a person who has been busy, but I can't always say that anymore. I work 3 nights a week. I'm home and awake for three days and four nights. In a row. What do I do with those? Well, I take care of my house and my kids. I take them to school and preschool, the library, the park (when it's sunny), Target. I make myself busy. And I've clung to the busy mentality, that someday, I'll have free time to do the things I've always said I wanted to do. And then last night, I realized...I could keep that mentality forever...but my busy excuse doesn't really apply anymore. I've got some free time...NOW.

Pastor Mike's sermon was about Lent. 40 days of change. Hope calls it an Extreme Makeover. We are encouraged to hone in on the spiritual disciplines. I've just learned what they are:

Fasting (I can already smell failure on this one)
Fellowship (MY FAVORITE!)
Confession
Celebration
Study
Service
Simplicity
Prayer

He spoke about why we give things up for lent, the purpose behind it: to discipline ourselves to be closer to God. Not in the way where we tell everyone what we're doing and look distraught and talk about it all the time. But in a "between you and me, God" type of way. Conscious decisions to stick to "it", whatever "it" might be. He encouraged us not to tell everyone what we're giving up and making a big deal out of it, and while I'm going to tell you what I'm doing for Lent, it's not for the purpose of getting positive feedback, or so that I can look forlorn and people will feel sorry for me. I'm telling you because this is both a confession (see above list of discipline) as well as my service, as well as my prayer, simplicity, celebration, and fellowship. It requires prayer and study. I haven't found a decent way to incorporate fasting yet...shoot.

Anyway, for lent, I've decided to follow through. Anticlimatic right?

Here are my thoughts:

Confession: I have lots of great ideas. I think about making people happy all the time. I think of great gifts to give, things I could do to serve people, ways I could make things better for others, ways to show God's love....and then, I don't do it. I rarely do it, anyway. And if I do, it turns out haphazard, rushed...not the way I intended, at all. I've had lots of excuses for these turnouts. #1 on the list: I've just been so busy! And that excuse has, up until now, worked for me.

Prayer and Study: In order to follow through on things, it has necessitated prayer and study. What does God want me to do? How can I use what he's given me to achieve it? When it's hard, how can I find encouragement through Him?

Simplicity: My ideas are sometimes big. Bigger than what I can handle, and often unrealistic. My funds are limited (shocker). How can I follow through with the things I want to do to help people with the resources I have been given? This leads me to a mindset of simplicity. And it keeps my intentions from getting lost in the bigness of the idea. I'm happy for that. Scenario: I'm bummed I can't afford a missions trip. I'd LOVE to go on a missions trip. What can I do instead? What CAN I do? Turns out: lots. Lots of simple things.

Service: the act of following through on the ideas I'm given to make people's lives better.

Fellowship & celebration: The joy that comes along with, during, and after an act of service and the completion of a discipline. This part is super osem.

Today I went to help out with Meals from the Heartland. I was late signing up. No surprise there. Normally this would turn out as me not going at all, or doing something haphazard instead. The spots were full for packaging meals. But there was openings on the clean up crew. Cleaning up? Huh. Less glamorous for sure. Pregnant girl? "What good are you?" I thought. I pictured myself backing out when asked to carry a big table or all the reasons I couldn't. Then there was the time. I was only available from 9-11..when Soph is at preschool. Packaging stops at 8:30. Another reason not to go. And normally I wouldn't. I still had those same thoughts. But I disciplined myself to go. I ended up volunteering on the cleaning crew, carrying empty boxes from A to B in the church. It was tiring, but the atmosphere was extraordinary. The air was buzzing with joy, fellowship, and celebration. All through an act of service.

Simplicity: I was given this gift by God today. I carried boxes...aka...I carried a watermelon. That's what I kept thinking each trip up and down the stairs with boxes. You know....Dirty Dancing quote? My ego would've loved to have been up on the stage reporting excitedly how many meals had been packaged as of 8:30 with lots of applause to follow. But instead, I found EXTREME joy in a simplistic task, along with a group of other box carriers, following through on an experience I will NEVER forget, and I can't believe I've missed out on all this time.

While I've told you what my plan for Lent is, I won't report each thing I follow through on, nor am I hoping for pats on the back from others. This IS something between me and God and I can't wait to continue on with it, to see where it leads me, to see what I can do when I listen to instruction. But writing/blogging is where my thoughts come to the surface and make sense (to me anyway!). And now that I've written it, I've committed to it. And that's why this entry exists.

I'm excited for what God will do this season. Oh the places we'll go.... (Thanks Dr. Seuss).

Happy Lent!